Friday 27 February 2009

Madness

I've really neglected this. It's been absolutely months since I last made an update. I had very little worth writing. My mind has been in a million places, and able to concentrate on nothing. I've had so much that I've wanted to do, and despite being insanely busy I've achieved virtually nothing. I've had some big losses, yet gained in other ways. My biggest loss is definitely the fact that my Gran died 3 weeks ago, but somehow I think I've gained from that too. Unlike the rest of my family I couldn't be there when she died and have felt really horrible about it, but I'll always know she was proud of me. For being the first in our family to go to uni, for having a dream, for facing some of the things I have overcome, for everything I've ever done. For being me, just because she was, and always will be, my Gran. It's taught me quite a bit though. I now know who I can depend on and who means most to me. Actually, thinking about it, of all the reasons I could have had for not being with her when she died, I'm quite glad it was something she was proud of me for.

I've got just 3 weeks of lectures left before Graduation and I'm seriously scared. I don't have a clue what I'll be doing in a few months time yet, and although I've got some big decisions to make, my future, for now, partly lies in someone else's hands while I wait to see if I've got any offers for next year. I should know in about 2 weeks time.

Things in the more recent future are getting insane. I've now got 2 dance classes a week, with extra rehearsals in the lead up to the show. I'm also modelling in a fashion show on Thursday (EEK!), going to the Networking Dinner on Friday, AU dinner on the 16th and my Dad's wedding on the 26th. Some time before then I've got to find outfits, sort out lecture notes, study for seminars, start coursework etc. It's getting stupid. There's a chance I'm going on holiday on the 27th and I'm going to need it.

I'll miss uni so much when it's over though.

Music: Kyte - Eyes Lose Their Fire ♥
Socks: One orange & stripy, one blue with a teddy sewn on